Addictions
by Rebecca1
Summary: What happens when JJ comes to confront Reid and try to help him get past his addiction ? Well he takes up another one ...


So I put my iPod on shuffle and this song came up :-

_Addicted – Enrique Iglesias_

I decided I'd write something for it as a 'challenge' for myself although this is only very loosely based on this song .

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Spencer glanced down at Jennifer who lay asleep in his arms. It was wrong, this they knew but it didn't stop them. He'd been off Dilaudid for two weeks now and it was all her fault. This was a good thing, and to the both of them a massive accomplishment. He'd even apologised to the team (at the 'advice' of Miss Jareau) individually with a massive apology for Emily which all of them accepted it graciously. Even his work ethic was getting back on track just as his behaviour. Partly. See his problem was that he'd jumped straight from one addiction to another – her. Sex with her although he thought that term was wrong. He found he quite enjoyed possessing her, controlling her. There was no love involved - though he did love her – it was purely animalistic. Even now, though she slept in his arms all he wanted was to wake her up and have his way with her once again. When he craved Dilaudid they had sex, when he craved her they had sex. Knowing it was dangerous and beyond stupid didn't stop him though he'd only ever told her she helps him with the need of Dilaudid – he was too worried about losing the fix that JJ gave to him to tell her that he'd begun needing her instead. Silently, he cursed her for not looking this up. He cursed her for being so damn attractive and himself for making this happen.

**Two Weeks Earlier :-**

_He'd just gotten home and already he'd begun to feel irate and needy. He needed it so bad; it was all he could think about. Slamming his messenger bag down on his kitchen counter, he rooted through it impatiently as he tried to find the Dilaudid. Sighing in relief as he found it, he stuck the needle into the vial and added just a little more than he usually did telling himself that it was necessary. Flicking it in order to get the air out of it, he lifted up the right sleeve so it was up just above his elbow. The needle was just about to break through his skin when there was a too loud, insistent knock on the door. It wouldn't stop. Furious, Spencer dropped the needle and rushed to the door, pulling it open, a deadly scowl on his face. JJ. He should've known it'd be her or Morgan. _

_Without hesitation the woman barged past him and into his apartment, stopping short as she saw the all too ready needle and vial. The needle with what she thought was far too much of the substance. Somewhat relieved, she let out a sigh just happy to have gotten to his apartment before he took it. She knew he'd be pissed off and short-tempered, she could see the beginnings of it on the jet ride home. Still, he needed someone to talk to and he needed to be brought back to reality somehow and right now no-one was helping him. She knew the team thought he'd come to them eventually when he really needed to talk to them but she knew better. Still, she'd wanted to give him some time knowing that if it was her in his position she'd hate to have everyone crowding around her and treating her like a child. That had been a mistake – all of them had to admit that. Never in her wildest dreams though had she thought he'd turn to drugs and not to them; not to her. In all honesty, she loved him and cared about him too much to watch as he destroyed himself. It was also that she felt like she was indebted to him, she needed to ease the guilt somehow and as selfish as it was she'd give him anything he wanted of her after she'd left him to get kidnapped by Tobias and his alter-ego's._

"_What the hell are you doing!?" Reid barked as he slammed the door shut and stalked towards her. She'd never seen this side to him and she doubted Emily had either, but it terrified her. "You have no right to be here and I want you out!" He was stood directly in front of her so she took a cautious step back._

_Maybe it was a mistake to come here, she'd thought although she quickly dismissed it. She had a job to do. "I just wanted to-" _

"_Wanted to what huh?" The genius smirked, and not out of amusement, as he mocked her. "See if poor little Spencer is alright? How he's coping?" The words were practically spat out as he continued to advance upon her when she continued to step backwards until she hit a wall._

"_I wanted to know if you wanted to talk or if you wanted some company." Jennifer's voice was small and she avoided eye contact. In truth she was actually almost shaking in fear, he looked dangerous almost like he'd actually hurt her._

"_I don't want to talk and I do not need yours or anybody else's company!" His hands slammed the wall either side of her head, trapping her. Forcing her chin up so she'd meet his eye, he leaned in close to her; "do you understand me?" _

"_Yes." The blonde whispered, tears filling her eyes unwillingly. Only then did he let her go, walking away from her._

"_Get out." _

_Oh how she wanted to escape from him and put some distance between them but she couldn't move. _

"_JJ, out!" She jumped at the sudden shout but still didn't move. Finding her resolve she took a deep breath and a major risk._

"_No!" The shout was just as loud as his, causing him to turn around and scowl at her. "I'm not leaving you. Not again. Not ever." She was so glad she sounded a whole lot more confident than she felt. _

"_I don't want you here." Reid stated to her. There was a lot of distance between them now – him in front of the sofa and her still backed up against the wall. "Leave, JJ." _

_They stared at each other for a long moment before she started to slowly walk towards him; observing him as his eyes got wide and he stepped back. "No, Spence."_

"_Why?" The younger man whispered, all the fight out of his body. Even the thought of Dilaudid had faded into the back of his mind – his focus lay solely on the woman in front of him. _

"_I can't leave you again. I don't want you to go through this on your own and you're better than this. You don't need that." JJ gestured toward the kitchen counter, both of them knowing what she was referring to but neither wanting to admit it. "You can talk to me, to any of us, Spence. Always." _

"_I can't fight it, there's nothing to stop it JJ. It's too hard." Reid's voice was cracked and broken, full of defeat showing just how much he believed those words and her heart broke for him, wishing she could rewind time._

"_Yes you can." Jennifer took a step towards him so that they were directly in front of one another, making him look into her eyes. "You're the strongest person I've ever met. You've been through so much and yet you're still fighting-"_

"_What if I don't want to fight anymore?" This was part of the Spencer she knew and she was almost thankful for it. She was glad they were talking like this, depending on each other._

"_Then I'll fight for you." The simple declaration had the genius gaping at her as though she were crazy._

"_How? You're not the one who has to fight with the need to use. How can I be strong if I've let my life be controlled by Dilaudid? I don't know how to be what everyone wants me to be anymore, I don't even know who I am anymore." After a moment he added; "except for a junkie." _

_Sighing, the media liaison crossed her arms in irritation. "You're not a junkie Spencer. And anyway isn't the first step of getting clean admitting that you've got a problem?" Seeing he was about to interrupt, she quickly continued. "We don't expect you to be anyone but you. Anything you give to us we'll accept. We want you to be OK. We want to help you. I want to help you." _

_Doubt crossed his face momentarily as he searched hers for any sign that she was lying. Satisfied that she wasn't he let out a long breath. "What do you expect me to do? How am I supposed to stop the cravings when there's nothing to distract me? Do you really wanna be the one to do that cos I'm sorry JJ but it's gonna take a little more than this or some stupid card game to even momentarily take my mind off it and the fallout. God, the withdrawal symptoms I'll go through, do you really think you'd be able to handle that? I don't even know if I'd be able to handle that." Once again his voice had raised and he felt that familiar irritation taking over him. _

"_I'll do anything you want me to. I'm gonna be here whether you want me to or not. You are not gonna go through this alone." He knew that was final. Without replying, he roughly grabbed her and forced his mouth onto hers, roughly kissing her. It was stupid he knew but he couldn't help it. She pulled away but he didn't apologise. "Spence, I don't think that's a good idea." _

_Momentarily, he looked at her, the way he used to before Tobias and she wanted him. "Please JJ, I need this. Take my mind off it, God, please help me." His begging did it for her and she pulled him back to her, kissing him with all she had. It didn't take long for them to have made it to the bed, for him to take her. It felt great – rough but all consuming, nothing existed but them. _

Spencer wasn't proud of that. Heck, he'd practically forced her into bed with him but he wasn't complaining. He loved to hear his name screamed into the room. He loved that she wanted it just as much as he did. And it had worked; the cravings for Dilaudid weren't as overwhelming as they were before. They'd never been on a date though, they'd never done anything like that but he knew he didn't want to lose her. In work they acted naturally, once out of work they got together and had sex.

His thoughts came to a halt when he felt Jennifer stir beside him and kiss his too pale chest.

"Morning." She murmured as she pushed herself impossibly closer to him, basking in the warmth of his body. "What're you thinkin' 'bout?"

He smiled and kissed her hair. "Go out with me tonight, if we don't have a case." The doctor could feel her smile as she leant up to kiss his lips.

"I thought you'd never ask."

- . - . - . - . - . - . - .

**So er, yeah there's that . Not great but hey what can yah do ?**

**Let me know what you think ? And thanks for reading :D**


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